03/04/2014
Na die diens een Sondag vra die middeljarige Sannie haar man: "Lyk dit nie vir jou ook of daai Smit-meisie haar hare kleur nie?" " Ek het haar nie eers raakgesien nie," antwoord haar man. "En daai rok wat Lettie Steyn aangehad het," gaan Sannie voort. "Moenie se jy het gedink dis geskikte drag vir `n 40 jarige ma van ses nie?" "Ek is bevrees, ek het dit ook nie opgemerk nie," antwoord haar man weer. "Hmf! snork Sannie verontwaardig. "Dit help ook veel jy gaan kerk toe!"
02/11/2012 Geniet die naweek!
28/09/2012 KERK BLAPSIES
06/08/2012
21/07/2012 Relax it's weekend!!!
13/07/2012 Enjoy your weekend!!
02/07/2012 Funnies!!!!
20/06/2012 How strong is your faith???
08/06/2012 Enjoy your weekend!!!!
04/06/2012 Hoop julle het `n lekker dag gehad!
31/05/2012 Geniet `n koppie boeretroos met `n lekker grappie!!
Na die diens een Sondag vra die middeljarige Sannie haar man: "Lyk dit nie vir jou ook of daai Smit-meisie haar hare kleur nie?" " Ek het haar nie eers raakgesien nie," antwoord haar man. "En daai rok wat Lettie Steyn aangehad het," gaan Sannie voort. "Moenie se jy het gedink dis geskikte drag vir `n 40 jarige ma van ses nie?" "Ek is bevrees, ek het dit ook nie opgemerk nie," antwoord haar man weer. "Hmf! snork Sannie verontwaardig. "Dit help ook veel jy gaan kerk toe!"
02/11/2012 Geniet die naweek!
28/09/2012 KERK BLAPSIES
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06/08/2012
21/07/2012 Relax it's weekend!!!
13/07/2012 Enjoy your weekend!!
02/07/2012 Funnies!!!!
20/06/2012 How strong is your faith???
08/06/2012 Enjoy your weekend!!!!
04/06/2012 Hoop julle het `n lekker dag gehad!
31/05/2012 Geniet `n koppie boeretroos met `n lekker grappie!!
12/05/2012 Gelukkige Moedersdag!
07/05/2012 Mothers Day Jokes!
Mother, talking to old college friend: "Remember, before I was married I had three theories about raising children? Well, now I have three children and no theories!"
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THE BEST WAY TO KEEP CHILDREN AT HOME
IS TO CREATE A PLEASANT ATMOSPHERE -
AND TO LET THE AIR OUT OF THEIR TIRES.
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07/05/2012 Enjoy your week friends!!!
25/04/2012 The Ten Commandments
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked,"Is there a commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
18/04/2012 TEKENS VAN OUD WORD!
Alles pyn, wat nie pyn nie, werk nie.
Die glinster in jou oog, is die sonlig op jou dubbellens bril.
Jy voel soos die oggend daarna, behalwe jy was nerens heen nie.
In jou afspraakboek begin al die name met Dr ........
Jy raak uitasem van kaartspeel.
Jou kinders begin vir jou middeljarig lyk.
Jy ken al die antwoorde, maar niemand vra jou nie.
Jy sien uit na `n vervelige aand tuis.
Jy het `n bril nodig, om joune te soek.
Jy skakel die lig af om te bespaar, nie omdat jy romanties raak nie.
Jou neus loop, maar jou bene wil nie.
Jou huis raak te groot en jou medisynekas te klein.
Jy vat `n lekker hap aan `n biefstuk, en jou tande bly agter.
Jou verjaarsdagkoek sak inmekaar onder die gewig van al die kersies.
17/04/2012 Enjoy your day!
04/04/2012 Jerigo se muur!
Die inspekteur kom by die skool en vra vir die juffrou of hy vir die klas vrae kan vra om hul godsdienskennis te toets.
Inspekteur: "Wie het die muur van Jerigo laat breek?"
Jannie: "Dit was nie ek nie Meneer."
Toe roep die inspekteur die juffrou eenkant toe en vra haar oor Jannie se antwoord.
Juffrou: "Jannie is baie eerlik. As hy se dit was nie hy nie, dan glo ek hom."
Die inspekteur gaan toe onthuts na die die hoof toe.
Hoof: "Dis `n eerlike juffrou. As sy Jannie glo, dan is dit so."
Uit radeloosheid skryf die inspekteur toe vir die minister van onderwys oor die situasie.
Die minister antwoord:
"Kry drie kwotasies, dan kry ons `n kontrakteur om die muur weer op te bou."
03/04/2012 Wyse Woorde!
In hierdie lewe is `n sin vir humor onontbeerlik: Dit help ons om die snaakse in die lelike raak te sien; die onkonvensionele te verstaan; die onaangename te verdra; die onverwagte dinge te hanteer en die ondraaglikes tong-in-die-kies te oorleef. - William A Ward -
02/04/2012 Funny Church Signs
30/03/2012 Wens julle `n wonderlike naweek toe!!!!
20/03/2012 JOKE!
Every Friday evening after work, Gamat would braai a big, fat juicy steak. But his neighbours, being Catholic and therefore not allowed to eat meat on a Friday, suffered agonies of temptation as the delicious aroma carried on the evening breeze. They persuaded the priest to try and convert Gamat ... and the priest was successful in doing so. When Gamat attended mass, the priest sprinkled the holy water over him and said: "You were born a Protestant, raised a Protestant, but now you are a Catholic. Everybody was delighted , but when Friday night came, the wonderful aroma of grilled steak again wafted over the neighbourhood. The priest rushed into Gamat's garden just in time to see him clutch a small bottle of holy water, sprinkling it over the grilling meat and chanting: " Djy was gebore n bees, djy was raised a bees, maar nou is djy snoek!!!!"
20/03/2012 FUNNIES!
Instruction About Church
A Sunday school teacher asked the children just before she dismissed them to go to church, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?"
Annie replied, "Because people are sleeping."
15/03/2012 CARTOONS
15/03/2012 Just thinking .....
It is remarkable how the apostle Paul covered so much territory and accomplished
so much without even a car.
You may not know all the answers, but you probably won't be asked all the questions, either.
You can learn many things from children. How much patience you have, for instance.
4/03/2012 FUNNIES!!!
The Creation of Wives
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially intent when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs. Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny, what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."
14/03/2012 DON'T WORRY!!!!
13/03/2012 Funnies!
If Noah had been truly wise,
he would have swatted those two flies.
12/03/2012 HUG COUPON
12/03/2012 SMILE!
Some people are too tired to give you a smile.
Give them one of yours,
as no one needs a smile so much as he who has no more to give
09/03/2012 Manne geniet die kamp .... hier is `n moontlike besprekingspunt!
08/03/2012 Funnies!!!!
The Sermon Preparation
A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon.
"How do you know what to say?" he asked.
"Why, God tells me."
"Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"
06/03/2012 Vir al die Onderwysers ....
05/03/2012 Lag `n bietjie .....
THE RAIN FALLS ON THE JUST AND ALSO ON THE UNJUST,
BUT CHIEFLY ON THE JUST,
BECAUSE THE UNJUST STEALS THE JUST'S UMBRELLA.
01/03/2012 LAUGHTER IS ......
LAUGHTER IS LIKE PREMIUM GASOLINE: IT HELPS TAKE THE KNOCK OUT OF LIVING!
29/02/2012 Happy Leap Day!
28/02/2012 Vir die MANNE ....
27/02/2012 Grappie!
Blond het nooit kerk toe gegaan nie. Op `n dag sien die pastoor sy woon die oggend diens by. Daarna is sy soggens en saans, met bidure en bybelstudie in die kerk. Na drie maande vra die pastoor eindelik vir haar: "Na al die jare wat jy nooit kerk toe gegaan het nie, kan jy nou nie genoeg kry nie?" Sy antwoord: "Dis die nuwe motor van my pastoor . Die verkoopsman het gese as ek een diens mis, verval my waarborg."
24/02/2012 Dames geniet die kamp, hier is `n moontlike besprekingspunt ..........
23/02/2012 Vir almal wat vandag nie gesond voel nie!
21/02/2012 FUNNIES!
The Sermon
A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?"
16/02/2012 IS JY LUS VIR KOOK VANAAND? HIER IS `N WENK!
15/02/2012 Grappie vir die dag!
Oom gaan dokter toe met `n maag probleem. Die dokter se: "jy sal `n scope moet sluk oom." Die oom bly so `n rukkie stil ...... "Boet ek is `n kerkmens, kan ek nie maar eerder `n Landbouweekblad sluk nie?"
14/02/2012 Is dit sover vir jou n lekker dag gewees?
14/02/2012 Happy Valentines day to one and all
13/02/2012 Dis Maaaaaaaaaaaaaaandag!!!! Geniet julle week!
10/02/2012 FUNNIES!
After the Preaching on the Devil
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?"
The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa Claus turned out. It's probably just your dad."
09/02/2012 FUNNIES!
New in Church
After the service a young couple talked to a church member about joining the church. He hadn't met the husband before, and he asked what church he was transferring from.
After a short hesitation, he replied,"I am transferring from the Municipal Golf Course."
08/02/2012 Technology!!!
07/02/2012 Good morning, wishing you a lovely day!
06/02/2012 Wonderlike dag aan julle almal!
06/02/2012 Is vandag n blou Maandag? Daar is lig in die tonnel.....
The Sin of Lying
ReplyDeleteA Minister told his congregation, "Next week I plan to preach about the sin of lying. To help you understand my sermon, I want you all to read Mark 17."
The following Sunday, as he prepared